Family Frameworks

Empty Nester and Loving IT!


Mar 2013


To tell you the truth when I was young I didn’t necessarily think “I want to grow up and be an empty nester”.  But I did want to be a mom and grandma and experience life in a lot of different ways.  I never really understood the freedom we have but also the responsibility we have.

As Empty nesters we enjoy the freedom to take off on the weekend or whenever and just enjoy ourselves.  Take for instance this weekend,  we took off a day from work and John is riding his bike and experiencing the outdoors and I’m with my daughter’s family enjoying our grandson.  We can take off and not feel the responsibility as we did when we were raising our family.

But would I have wished I could always been an empty nester.  Not at all.  Our lives are richer for the experiences we have had with our children.  The challenges and the joys that come with raising children.  We had to find time to be together and enjoy each other just like everyone else.  We had to find the balance and as we found the balance we grew closer to each other.

I find it funny now that we are through raising our kids we are doing stuff we told them not to do such as “let the dog on the furniture” or “eating dessert first” or eating no vegetables in a day.  We had to set the example back then and we now have the freedom to do it or not.  But we also need to show responsibility also.  I’ve heard of too many marriages breaking up during the empty nest period.   We can take our freedom too far.  having a free marriage thinking that now the kids are grown it doesn’t matter what we do or if we stay together is not necessarily good.  We still influence our kids and now our grandkids.    It still causes great confusion when parents break up after their kids are grown.  Our children wonder whether marriage is really worth it.   I know I value my marriage and I’m committed to it.  I want my children to have great marriages so I need to continue to set a good example.  

So even though we have the empty nest we still have responsibility.  I hope I can encourage young couples to find time together so that you have a history of fun and great memories as a couple when the kids are little,  you prepare in the younger years for the great times you can have when the kids are grown.  I want to encourage the empty nesters to set the example for your kids.  So they look at you and can say, I can’t wait till we can be empty nesters together.   What’s your experience with empty nesting?  

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